I've turned a corner.

Hey, Howdy, Hey!!  Yep, it's me! :) 

I hate looking back and noticing that it's been nearly a year since my last blog post.  This blog used to be my outlet for everything for a long time.  And well, life got busy...real busy.  I had this post running through my mind all day yesterday, so I've got to get it out.


Yesterday, I took my 3 kids, and my niece and nephew to Deep River Waterpark.  I packed a cooler with lunch and loads of snacks, and away we went.  It was a gorgeous day for it!  After applying sunscreen, the kids decided they wanted to play in the little jungle gym area by our seats so I just hung out and sunbathed! ;)

Not too long after we arrived, the kids came and said they wanted to go in the Lazy River.  I had Owen get on a life jacket cause he's not too confident in the water yet, even though he could touch and off they went!  I stood there waiting for them to come around again and once I saw them all, they were laughing and having a blast, saying they wanted to go around again.  I told them I'd be at our "headquarters" {Yes, that's what they named it} and to come back and check in after they went around again.

To say I about lost it would be an understatement.

For years, especially when they were little, I had been dying for this day.  Having 3 kids 3 and under was a HUGE task {for me!}.  I remember thinking how nice it was going to be when they could all buckle their own seat belts, or how great it's gonna be when they can all put on their own shoes and zip up their own coats.

Well, I'm there....they can do all those things...AND MORE! 

There I was, sitting at our "headquarters" all by myself, while they ran off and played.  I called Ryan:

Me:  Hi babe.

Ry:  Hey! {I could tell he was pre-occupied at work}

Me:  Well, I've turned a corner...all our kids are in the Lazy River by themselves, and I'm sitting all by myself. {totally trying to hold back the tears}

Ry:  Are they all together?

Me:  Yeah.

Ry:  O.K., babe, I gotta go, I'm super busy!

And that was that.  Now I really wanted to cry!   And just at that moment, Chloe, Owen and Tim ran up saying Brett was lost in the Lazy River!

In my mind I couldn't help but smile and think, YES!!  they still need me! ;)  {Don't worry, Brett was found playing and having fun in the Lazy River:) }

If this is what it's like to let them go off on their own at the waterpark, Oh My Heavens!  what's it going to be like when they go off to college?  Don't answer that...

One Year

It's hard for me to believe that tomorrow will be one year since Chloe's accident.

There are days that it feels like it was just yesterday.  And then there are days that I think about it, and it feels fresh and new like it just happened.  Crazy, but it's been one year.

I took some time to go back and read some of the older posts about her accident and the days after, and I cried. {you can read them here, here and here.  And if you want to, you can read my story about her accident on Chloe's blog here.}  I actually had forgotten about some of the events that had taken place, which in some cases are a good thing, but in other ways are a great reminder of exactly how God's hand worked in our little girls life.

A couple of weeks ago, I was looking on Facebook for a certain picture for our Christmas card, and came across these:

 

  These were right after her chest tube came out, and I couldn't wait to crawl in bed with her and snuggle her! ;)

Anyway, I saw these pics, and cried. {If you haven't figured it out by now, I cry too easily...Thanks to my Dad for that one! ;)}  Ryan was sitting next to me and was wondering why I was crying, so I showed him.  It took him by surprise when he saw what was on the screen.  I remember him saying, "Oh Aim."  He had a tear in his eye too, and we both expressed just how thankful we were that everything turned out the way it did! 

We are just so thankful for our girl and for her wonderful life!

Tomorrow is also Chloe's half-birthday.  The morning of the accident, she reminded me of this, and couldn't believe that no one remembered it was her half-birthday.  I gently told her that most people don't celebrate half-birthdays, because the real birthday is what's important.  Ryan told her in the hospital that we will be celebrating her half-birthday every year from now on!  And that's what we plan to do!  Tomorrow we will celebrate, not just her half-birthday, but her LIFE!!!!!

**Sorry, this post is a jumbled mess...I'm having a hard time getting my thoughts together this morning, but I wanted to share what was on my mind.